Monday, 29 March 2010

青菜写一写


站在路中央的我,
眼看着前方的路,
我没有千里眼,也没有顺风耳。
看不见也听不见遥远的道路和人群。
我能看见的
只是我眼前的建筑物,
迎面而来和离我而去的人们,
我以前只会不停的去猜测我的未来,
因为害怕未来而放弃,
因为没有信心而拒绝。
因为没有胆量而躲起来。

现在我总是不明白,
为何以前那么傻,
用望远镜去看世界,
忽略了出现在我身边美好的事物,
朋友与家人给予我的一切

美好的东西不多,
如果好好仔细地看,
一定能看到。
如果用望远镜去看世界,
远方的东西可能可以看到一清二楚
但是眼前的事物却会模模糊糊。

Saturday, 27 March 2010

Converge

What i like about this particular picture is the lines and the windows that converge towards that lady. who was walking down the stairs.

Monday, 15 March 2010

Rojak feelings

Today i had dinner with seniors. Today the weather was cold. I said the jacket i wore was rather not thick enough for such weather. One of the seniors replied by saying i am not wearing wrong jacket but being in wrong country. Not just me. a lot of people have been asking the very question that i have asked myself umpteen times. Why am i here in Germany? The answer to that question i have already known long time ago. I was naive back then to think that studying abroad and learning a foreign language would be very fun. however, i never regret for that decision.

People tend to forget as time goes by. It;s not a bad thing that people forget. Sometimes forgeting something or someone is a good solution to not remember the pain that has ripped your heart apart before.

9th March. 3 years have passed. What's left are the memories that were immortalized by photos and videos from the past, taken when he was still there with us. He was indeed a good friend.

Today is my first day of my 3rd semester. happy? not really.. sad? not much a bit but i feel sad all the time.. rarely i feel excited here in Germany. Lonely? very. some of friends didn't make it through to 3rd semester. Suicidal? yeah a bit. wad else can you think if you woke up, checked your facebook and found out that you were tagged in a video about killing everyone you know.. and last but not least.. disgusted? yes totally.. because Yi En said he loves me!!!

Wednesday, 10 March 2010

回到德国的感想

快乐的时光就好像黄昏般短暂。人很多时候都是贪心的。
我们都希望我们拥有更多的时间去做愉快的事情,最好是永远都可以抛开所有的烦恼和压力,尽情玩乐达到忘我的境界。

黄昏过后就是夜晚。夜晚就犹如人生的黑暗时光,夜晚时,我们前方的路好走不好走就得靠一路上路灯,照亮我们的前方,指引我们。路灯可以是我们说认识的朋友。路灯多的地方,在夜晚的时候走起路来也方便得多。反过来说,如果少了路灯为你照亮前方,你的生活恐怕会艰难很多,因为在漆黑的道路上行走,往往你都不知道你前方是一条柏油路,还是凹凸不平的烂泥路。

搭了十多个小时的飞机后,又好像疯人一样,拿着大包小包,再从飞机场跑到火车站搭火车,两个小时的路程后终于到达了Esslingen。过去的一个月好像做了一场梦,很想很想继续梦下去,不想回到现实世界。回到这里,生活180度转变。过去的一个月,我已经适应热热闹闹的环境,在家里父母亲叫我的声音,电视机声,风扇声,经过我家门前的汽车摩托车的引擎声,妈妈玩Zuma的声音。。。。。。以前我总是觉得妈妈叫我做这个那个很烦,离开家后却很想念有人这样的叫我,觉得很温馨。

回到德国,生活变得很空虚;周遭环境很幽静,隔壁邻居讲话声也听得到一个人没事做躺在床上,聆听从脑袋里发出的声音。三月中了,外面还下着雪,这样的天气我根本都没有心情出门走走。三月中应该是春天的时候,但是气温还是零下三四度。马来西亚的气温在我离开的那一天是三十六度。一时超热一时超冷,受苦的还是我的身体,不停地在打喷嚏。

Monday, 1 March 2010

counting days

Time accelerates when you want to have more time; Time creeps when you want the clock to tick faster. One month winter holiday is coming to an end and yeah i have enjoyed myself to the fullest at home. My right schedule for holiday activities started a few hours after i got off the plane and now i can finally sit back and relax in the last week of my winter holiday in Malaysia.

I could still remember vividly the excitement i had one year ago before i took the flight to Germany. I could wait to step my foot on German soil. Right now, one year after that, i wish i could stay, on Malaysian soil. The reluctance to bid goodbye to my parents who have done so many things for me and with me not only for the past one month, but for the past 21 years intensifies as 9th March gets near.

To be frank, studying in Germany is not really that fun. As an outsider, you might think that being able to further studies in oversea is something great, something to be proud of. A lot of my friends said to me that i am so lucky and i must have been enjoying my life there in Germany. Well my friends, the experience of being in oversea for a long time is very precious and good for self development and growing up, but to be honest, fun is never the word to describe it. I am not saying that studying abroad should not be encouraged, but a person will have to be strong to face more challenges and hurdles that will make your every steps difficult and be prepared to suffer the consequences of every decision that you make.

The way people think in other countries might not be the same as the way people think in Malaysia. There are things that you think are appropriate to do but for them it is a big mistake or cheating. This is how we learn things,you learn either from the mistakes that you yourself make, or the mistake that other people make.