Sunday, 29 June 2008

LEGO


They have been my companion since i was five. last time my brother and i had to share the Lego set my parents bought for us. haha after he was in secondary school. haha everything became mine.. my source of inspiration of course is Power Rangers series.. using lego i built lots of different robots (i prefer to call them megazords), ships and vehicles. I constructed those with my own imagination.

last time i was so addicted to lego and i played everyday. seeing me so addicted to it, my mother had to hide it because i was so addicted that i din finish my homework before i played. i searched high and low for my precious lego and most of the time to no avail. my mother only will gave me back during holiday. you know what. after i got it back every time after i played, i hid it. haha

of course the megazords shown above are not the best i have ever built but after i went to Shah Alam, i stopped playing and they remain in the shelf in my room.. i din buy any lego cos nowadays the lego is ridiculously expensive and i am ad contented with what i have right now.. i will never ever give it to anyone..

Home Made 'Ki Chang'

My mum made these "Ki Chang'
dip it with brown sugar sauce and it's delicious.

Friday, 27 June 2008

how much change in the past 2 years..

Finally, i finished my 2 years A level course in INTEC Shah Alam. so happy. It has been 2 years and a lot of things happened in these 2 years. my life, my attitude, my beliefs, my principles. i was influenced rather than being influential..

suddenly i recall one of the poem we learnt in secondary school.. life brief candle

To-morrow, and to-morrow, and to-morrow,
Creeps in this petty pace from day to day
To the last syllable of recorded time,
And all our yesterdays have lighted fools
The way to dusty death. Out, out, brief candle!
Life's but a walking shadow, a poor player
That struts and frets his hour upon the stage
And then is heard no more: it is a tale
Told by an idiot, full of sound and fury,
Signifying nothing.

William Shakespeare

haha just put for fun nothing related to my post..hehe just to make my post long

time creeps and i have not much time left for my german test and being in malaysia with my parents... haih... studying abroad has its pro and con.. but i dun think i will have difficulties adapting to the life in Germany cos i have been staying in Shah Alam most of the time and only going back 2-3 times per sem.. haha i am not a member of PBSM (Persatuan Balik rumah Setiap Minggu)

Looking at the mirror(quite often i do that, but compared to billy, hehe i am way behind), physically there is barely a difference compared to 2 years ago, but deep inside, i have changed a lot. i was a Chinese speaking Chinese..(it sounds a bit wrong but i think you know what i mean). when i talk, i cant run away from 'la' and 'ma'.. after coming to INTEC i encountered a lot of problem both social and linguistic problem. i couldn't talk good English and all the Chinese in my course communicate with English. at first a lot of sentences coming out from my mouth were grammatically wrong. (i still have the same prob.. he becomes she; she becomes he!) some of them corrected me again and again.. i know i should appreciate that.. yeah i do but you know la, i am quite sensitive (sensitive = sissy>>>> wrong) , most of the time i get offended. haha however now it is the other way round. i am not offended instead i glad they tell me the mistakes Billy and yi en... thank you for always correcting my English.. i really learn a lot from you guys! haha

oh boring as my post.. see some pictures first la..

introducing ALG 10C.... my classmates originally 15 of us but only 14 of us in the picture.. (the lost one is being the camera?.. haha you are wrong.. 2 sems ago we oredi assumed 10C only consist of 14 students.. if he is number 2 in skipping class, nobody dares to admit they are number one.

>>> 3 gals 11 guys
>>>10 malays, 3 chinese and 1 indian


surrounded by 10C fellow is my mechanics lecturer.. she is a great teacher. i could easily understand her explanation and the concepts she delivered..

my english lecturer- Mr. Bahnu. haha i am posing...learnt it from amir... during his class, we kept writing essays and guess what most of the time we didn't do, just pretended we were doing. we already have mindset of getting E for AS English is good enough to fly.. however we still need to get good grade because we need good English proficiency when applying jobs..


she is my chemistry lecturer, Ms. Chin. she is a good teacher. my chemistry improved a lot after because of her..

my maths lecturer.. she taught our class all 4 sems.. she likes our class i guess.. we are so obedient .. did all the homework assigned to us . ohh her name is Ms. Lee

my German lecturer.. Mr Brian Trenaman and ALG10 C and 10D.. the smartest person in this picture... look at the guy wearing white T at the back.. all of us were trying to make sure our face not blocked.. stood on tiptoe.. pushed the people in front.see that guy. just stood there with his arm cross and act cool...

handsome or not? i mean my lecturer la yo... sorry he is married...

haha if you are ardent reader of my blog, you should know that most of my previous posts are about friendship. I encountered countless problems with my friends. Being lonely and no one wanted to stay with me and i ended up being alone for 2 sems.. people said something and offended me.. i cried because my friend scolded me when playing dota and called me no balls because i dared not to get off the car... these kind of things may be for others those are nothing, but for me its really smth.. may be i am too sensitive and very often take things seriously.. haha, i shall learn how to absorb all those negative things and control my tears.. i am writing this not because i want them to think twice b4 they do those stuffs.. hehe just wanna ehh.. write it out for fun haha...

it dawns on me that i shouldn't change myself to mix around with people.. just be the way i am now and accept the way other people are..(may be when i step into the working society, i will have to change myself to outdo and outwit people...) i have promised myself a lot of things. don't be sarcastic, don't praise people when people do smth very good (yes you Yi En). change this change that but in the end, i fulfil none of those promises.. cos seriously Jiang Shan Yi Gai, Ben Xing Nan Yi. its difficult to change yourselves, but not impossible...

Yeah now, i kinda miss my friends in INTEC...hanging around in Ole Ole mall, having dinner or lunch together, playing bowling, playing tennis and guitar. (playing guitar? oh that's not quite true YET, practicing guitar more like it) frankly.. that period of time is the happiest moment in my life in Shah Alam. I was so wild and just let go and enjoy to the fullest. oh and i miss people calling me WASS (William's A**) or Big A**.

Wanted to write smth bout A level, but i don't dare to even think of it.. i did badly... kiss my As goodbye.. muahhh!!!

About Me

yi en asked me to fill in this... for fun.... when i was filling this, i had some reminiscence during primary school. everyone in my class had a book "About Me". we wrote stuff so that we would never forget each other.. something like the one i filled in. just that i couldn't decorate using highlighter or colour marker pens. there was one time we even wrote about me during lesson so my teacher got angry and confiscated our "about me" then after the UPSR, she gave us back after she wrote some words of encouragement inside every "about me".

LAYER 1: ON THE OUTSIDE

Name : William Teow Yeow Meng
Birth Date : 19th July 19**
Current Status : Single
Eye colour : brown may be
Righty or lefty : Righty

LAYER 2 : ON THE INSIDE
My Heritage : eh.tiow chew...
My Fears : loneliness
My Weaknesses : too sensitive, easily get angry
My Perfect Pizza : a cheap pizza

LAYER 3 : YESTERDAY, TODAY, TOMORROW
My thoughts first waking up : what's the time?
My bedtime : whenever i feel sleepy
My most missed memory : when i was a st john first aider

LAYER 4 : MY PICK
Pepsi or Coke : Coke
McDonald or Burger King : BK
Single or grouped dates : single
Adidas or Nike : both..if sneakers definitely adidas
Tea or Nestea : neither
Chocolate or vanilla : chocolate
Cappuccino or coffee : i thought cappuccino is one type of coffee!!!

LAYER 5 : DO YOU...
Smoke : Nope
Curse : yes but only shit.. the F bomb use when i really angry
Take a shower : who doesn't
Think you've been in love : yeah.
Go to school : yeap.
Want to get married : yeap.
Believe in yourself : sometimes. most of the time nope

LAYER 6 : IN THE PAST
Alcohol : yeap..
Gone to the mall : yeap
Been on stage : yeap
Eaten sushi : yeap. worked as a waiter in Japanese restaurant
Dyed you hair : nope.

LAYER 7 : HAVE U EVER
Played a stripping game : nope.
Changed who you were to fit in : yeah.. had to. in INTEC


LAYER 8 : AGE YOU'RE HOPING...
To get married : whenever i am ready, financially, mentally, physically

LAYER 9 : IN A GUY/GIRL...
Best eye colour : i dun care
Best hair colour : i dun care
Short hair or long hair : i dun care. as long as she looks good. must be organized la

Best height : as long as i am taller or same height..
Attitude : kind hearted, sensitive, not bossy, considerate..

LAYER 10 : WHAT WERE YOU DOING...
A minute ago : yi en asked me to fill in this
Hour ago : sent my friend to bus stop. they left for uni
4.5 hours ago : sleeping
1 month ago : having a level
Year ago : studying in INTEC

LAYER 11 : FINISH THE SENTENCES...
I love : my family, my friends
I feel : bored...

I hate : people who keep thinking every word i say must have hidden message or i being sarcastic.
I hide : secrets
I miss : my laptop
I need : ermm.. $$$$

LAYER 12 : TAGGING 5 PEOPLE
Bloggers : billy, jiaji, li ming, kai shuen, amir

Monday, 23 June 2008

messed up holiday

omg... my holiday will be boring.. a lot of time to kill but dunno how to kill...

my computer's wireless hardware is "kaputt" (spoiled) and needs to be sent to the HP headquater in Penang to repair. and it might take up to one month time to repair.

time taken= 1 month
Holiday = 3 weeks
going back on 13 July and coming back on 25 July so i would be without my com for more than one month!!!!!

ridiculous right! haih sad.. is it i have overused the wireless, everyday online in cemara. sad sad sad

Saturday, 21 June 2008

my first priority for now> kill time

My Plan for this Holiday
1. Travel around my home town and take pictures
2. find my source or inspiration for my blog post
3. of course write blog
4. improve my deteriorating German
5. read some novels
6 meet up with friends before they go to uni

sad cannot update my blog cos my laptop sent to be repaired. and all my pictures i need are in my laptop. sob:(

Saturday, 14 June 2008

Present: Free Thinker in my own way

When someone asked me why I have been going to church every week lately, my tongue tied, I was speechless, or perhaps at that moment, I needed some time to ponder about it. Erm.. Weird how come I couldn’t answer him just now! But seriously when I thought about it now, I think that question was quite funny. I have been going Church when I was little; thought not frequently, mainly because of my father who had to work almost every day, I went. does that answer the question why i go church recently?

I called myself free thinker, but no one actually understands my meaning of free-thinker. Or perhaps I misunderstand its meaning. I thought free thinker is just a person without religion. Until I came here to Shah Alam, I only realized the real meaning of free thinker. A free thinker is a person who doesn't believe in god. to say that, i am a free thinker, it is not quite right. I do believe in God.

suddenly thought about this.. just popped out in the mind (Sometimes I thought about one question that I really have been searching for answer- Which God do I believe in, does it matter?)

Now I really have the feeling that I stuck at a crossroad. Which route should I take? I have been going to church but I am not a catholic. I pray to God when I am in church, but the way I do is different from others. And someone asked me about why I go church and I couldn’t answer. That is like vacuum cleaner you know! It sucks!

Something to share about my past!

Think about those days when I went every Friday to the church for the Sunday school. My mother had to send me to the bus and every kid in my Taman cramped into one bus, the air in the bus was stuffy and smelly. The Indian catholic community was quite big and we as the Chinese were minority in the bus. On the bus, I learnt some Tamil, but mainly foul language. Eg. ‘Cinapandi’. I think is Chinese pig. I think almost 3 years I attended the Sunday school. Then I got lazier and lazier back then because I hate the journey going there and also coming back. Besides that, my brother didn’t go to Sunday class anymore as he had undergone the confirmation and the nun that had treated very well that time left and served churches in Penang. What made it even worse was my poor result in school; I got my first D and the last in Science. I cried badly back then, until all my classmates looked at me and some consoled me and helped me beg the teacher for extra mark. Because of that, I went to tuition class; sadly it was on Friday morning. Between religion and academic, I chose the latter. My parents didn’t object the decision I made, at first I don’t quite know why, but now I know. They always respect the decision I made as long as the decision I made doesn’t harm anyone. That’s why my parents didn’t have me baptized when I was baby. They wanted me to choose for myself, which path I should take. I am the one who decides which path to take.

And now! I am old enough to make my own decision, believing in God and praying to Him and talking to him have simply made my life better and less stressful. I found peace, since I started going to church in Shah Alam. That’s the only reason I could think of. How did God create this world and us, human? Does that really matter? For me it doesn’t. Whether it is true or not, I don’t really care about it much. However, it doesn’t mean that I don’t believe in God, just that it is not the central of the religion. What is more important for me is the spiritual support that I got from Him and the peace that he gives to me.

Right now, I am neither a free-thinker nor a catholic, but I believe in God and I pray to Him. Like what Shivenes told me, I am a free-thinker in my own way.

Sunday, 8 June 2008

EPOH

worry
over someone
worry
over a lot of 'what-ifs'

what if this happens?
what if that happens?
what if and what if.....
as long as we are breathing
the 'what ifs' will never stop haunting us

worry over this
worry over that
and life goes on
worrying about other people
family, friends
and ourselves

but then
it dawns on me that
there's no point worrying
over things i can't change
not within my capabilities

i received a message
from someone asking me for advice
how to cope with things that worries her so much
then i started to type and reply her

i pause for a while and i think
deeply and carefully
how should i advise her

think and think
lack of ideas and constructive thoughts
how can a clay Buddha cross the river
since he himself has difficulties doing it?
how can a sick person help to take care others
who are sick? isn't that a suicide?

i tell myself.....
william! either you don't give or you should give a good one

all of a sudden

i realized that
there is no point worrying
as it does no good but harm
that rob us of peace and calmness

then i asked myself
what should i do
i can't help worrying for him

again.....out of the blue

yes. Hope
why don't i just hope
yes. Hope
though hope can't solve the problem
though hope can't miraculously cure a person
though hope can't help us to win the trophy
though hope can't guarantee us satisfaction
though hope can't promise us a better afterlife
though hope can't give us a satisfactory result
still hoping for something is certainly
certainly better than worrying over something

let's hope for the best though
there is just a glimmer of hope
as long as i can hope
i will hope
hope that things would turn out just fine
for him
for me
and for others